It Aint Over

Well, I suppose I haven't learned enough patience throughout this whole experience......cause it aint over. Just when I thought we were done, Cameron's score jumped up again and he had to go back under the lights this afternoon. I won't lie. I'm heartbroken, disappointed, frustrated, discouraged. Why has this been such a long ordeal you may ask? Don't lots of infants suffer from jaundice? The answer is yes, many newborns suffer from mild to moderate jaundice. The difference with Cameron is that his jaundice is merely a symptom of a bigger 'disease'. He has a form of hemolytic disease, referred to as ABO incompatibility or Coombs positive by all his doctors and nurses. To put it simply, I have O+ blood type and Cameron has A+. When our blood came in contact during pregnancy my blood started making antibodies against his blood. These antibodies attack his red blood cells and 'kill' them. Once he was born and my liver was no longer disposing of his broken down red blood cells, he was left with an excessive amount of expired red blood cells to dispose of himself. With an underdeveloped liver it is too much for his little body to handle. Bilirubin is the yellow breakdown product of the expired red blood cells. When your body is unable to dispose of the broken down cells, the bilirubin piles up and stores in the fatty tissues, causing the yellowish color in jaundice. The concern is when the bili level gets so high that the possibility of it entering the brain and causing permanent damage (kernicterus) is high. That is why they acted so fast with Cameron in the hospital. Many nurses told me his was the highest score they had ever seen. (Thankfully this was days after he was admitted to the NICU, after his scores had come down, so I could respond rationally.) When I initially asked the doctors how long he would need to be under the lights they told me that it all depended on how long my antibodies lasted. Apparently they're still running rampant in his body, attacking his red blood cells. My poor little boy. Wish I could just tell those stupid antibodies of mine to die off already. When that will be no one knows. Thanksgiving would sure be nice.